Caring for yourself is more than skin deep

In my life, I have always been a bit of a girlie girl with an attitude.  What I mean by that is that I always liked to look girlie, but I didn’t want to come off as vain or fragile.  So I balanced the art of trying to look good without looking like I spent too much time doing it.  This has served me well because I enjoy dressing up, and playing a bit of a chameleon with my wardrobe.  This is probably one reason I got involved with the performing arts.

So when someone once told me that I don’t take very good care of myself, I didn’t understand what that meant.  I dressed nicely as my budget allowed. But secretly, I often hated the way I looked.  Money was always a commodity and often times, what appeared to be a nice outfit was barely being held together with needle and thread.  You may have not seen it, but I knew it.  And what seemed like pretty hair was hair that needed a trim desperately.

The thing is, I was raised in this fashion. I regularly wore shoes where the soles were so worn, that there were literally holes in the bottom.  I grew up wearing other people’s hand me downs.  I was simpy not used to buying myself things that I needed and had a very strict categorization of what was an absolute “necessity”.  I sometimes went for years without spending more than $100 on clothing for the whole year.

That wasn’t the only place I didn’t care for myself.  If I was warm, I wouldn’t turn on the air conditioner.  If I was thirsty, I would remain that way.

More too it.

Little things like comfy shoes, clothing that fits, getting lining repaired, bringing snacks.